All Things Chill

Long distance relationships. Three words that I would like to use sparingly for the rest of my life. Haha. Although I avoid it like the plague, “LDRs” do work and can even last a lifetime. That being said, it’s quite hard to find a perfect match, let alone have the constitution to keep your soul mate further than arms reach all of the time. For most people, it’s just too much to handle without the regular joys of having someone close by.

Why do they fail? In all honesty, I’d say a lack of physical contact. Physical contact transcends the the simple sense of touch. It not only effects the body, but the mind and soul as well. Actions such as holding hands and spooning (!!!) reinforce what’s already there. A sweet caress of the cheek or a brush of the lips can remain in someone’s thoughts far longer than a sweet phrase or comment. Argue if you will, but it is those memories (like a first kiss) that are easier in to conjure in my own mind.

So, when physical contact is absent, what is there to fill the void? Words, of course. Stories about the future. Aspirations of love. Plans for success. Confessions of an unlocked heart. Whether they were written as a poem with a feather on handmade paper, an original song recorded between other cheesy songs on cassette tape, or expressed sincerely over the phone, these feelings are the only way to keep a long distance relationship alive. Flowers, presents and candies help, but they are mere trinkets to accompany real emotion.

What else can replace the physical? Arguments. Worries. Jealousy. And sometimes, nothing at all. The silence between two people that were once in love can be deafening. One may feel as though they were thrown in to an empty room of white light… with nothing to distract them from running worrisome scenarios in the mind over and over again. It’s almost as if the lack of physical contact creates an emotional wound that can either be healed or infected depending on the efforts of both people.

Although I’d love to read it, a guide to long distance relationships doesn’t exist (and if have one, you paid waaaayyyy too much for it). There isn’t only one way to handle situations as dynamic as this. All I would recommend is to remember why you do the things you do… and if that person deserves all the love you have to give. I’m sure some couples love their “personal bubbles” to be thousands of miles wide…

…but as for me…

I wouldn’t mind sharing a little space.

~Spec

This entry was posted on Friday, March 17th, 2006 at 2:38 am and is filed under Relationships. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.